Dead Digest: The Walking Dead (SSN 7, Ep 3)

Episode 3: "The Cell"

Negan’s house sucks and I’d like to go back to The Kingdom, please. In tonight’s episode, we learned that living as part of the Savior's fam comes with a price. This news, of course, shocked no one. Poor Darryl; Things are really not going well for him. We find our dear friend nude and dirty in a little, concrete solitary confinement cell; No windows, with only a sliver of light under the door. His only meal is a truly disgusting looking dog food sandwich. Literally, canned dog food with bread. As if the bread somehow makes up for the fact that it's dog food. The best part? They play him the same song on repeat all day. Clearly, this is the type of torture that has broken lesser men in the past. Our old friend Dwight is his jailor. Remember Dwight from last season? He and his wife Sherrie betrayed Mr. Dixon in the forest last season. Sherrie’s sister Tina ended up dead. Now Dwight is a “loyal” soldier and is running around in Darryl’s winged vest, using his cross bow, and generally being a dick to everyone.

Eventually Darryl is given some truly ugly clothes to wear and is taken to the doctor to be patched up. Sherrie, Dwight, and Dr. Feelgood all try and tell him to just get with the program and kneel. More attempts at breaking Dixon down are promptly thwarted. At this point I’m screaming at the TV, "C’mon Darryl! Just say you’re one of them and try to fuck up the system from the inside!" But he refuses. We also get to learn the whole history of how Dwight, Sherrie, and Tina ended up in those woods…and the fallout from it. Long story short, Negan got to marry/steal Sherrie, Tina is dead, and Dwight “got the iron.” Hmm. Explains why half his face is melted off now.

Negan totally broke these people; he OWNS them. But is it really, truly too late? We see glimmers that Dwight isn’t really bought in. He just fears for his life and that of his now ex-wife. One example of this is when he is forced to go collect a deserter. This dude used to be his friend, and now he’s lost everything. He can’t understand why they don’t topple the Negan dictatorship, and he would rather be SHOT dead right then and there than go back to Neagan’s compound. Dwight threatens to destroy the lives of everyone this random dude knows unless he comes along. (Side note - am I supposed to know this character’s name?? Let’s just capitalize "dude" and move on.) But once Dude’s back is turned, he shoots him. See? Dwight KNOWS that being dead is better. Just like in “Pet Semetary.”

What happens now? Can the folks under Negan’s thrall really overpower this madman? Is it truly better to be under Negan’s servitude than to be out there scrappin’ for survival?

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Top 4 Moments of the Night:

1. Did my ears deceive me? Or do we in fact, get a 90 min episode next week?!?
2. Darryl CRIED. He wept in his nasty little cell! The kicker was when Dwight gave him a polaroid of Glen’s impression of a puddle and said it was his fault his friend died. [insert crying emoji here!]
3. Negan has a quaint little apartment. A studio by the looks of it. Is this his only place? Or just his apartment at this location? Either way, he has books and a fern.
4. The use of music in this episode. This show usually nails it, but damn, they got it so right tonight.

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Dead Digest: The Walking Dead (SSN 7, Ep 2)

Episode 2: "The Well"

“Ezekiel 25:17.”The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children.”

Welcome back! I've never claimed to be a biblical scholar, so forgive me if the passage above is a bit off. I had to call on my Google-foo to help me out. So on tonight’s episode, we picked back up with Morgan and Carol for the first time since last year. After Carol is injured, the pair are rescued by a group of people wearing body armor, while astride some horses. Turns out these are the “knights” of King Ezekiel. Yes, King. Well, really he’s just a handsome man with dreadlocks and a tiger named Shiva. Ezekiel is the kind and good-hearted ruler of The Kingdom; the denizens of which are happy, shiny, and productive people. Fertile crops! School children! All the cobbler one can eat! It all makes Carol wanna puke. She never did take kindly to people who didn’t have the good sense to realize they’re living through the end of the world. Ezekiel postures and speaks with all the poise of a moderately good Shakespearean theater actor. His “court” is even held on a quaint community stage. The tiger is most impressive. His subjects seem loyal and happy to play along with his little LARP.

Carol puts on her goody humble homemaker act to try and seem unassuming while she plots her escape. Morgan, thankful for the good king’s help and that of his subjects, repays his debt to them by going along on some secret missions. Only the King and his most trusted guards are allowed on these little treks. Morgan and the merry band set out on the surrounding streets to round up some pigs and feed them walkers. The piggies are then slaughtered and surrendered to none other than Negan’s Saviors. Here is yet another group under his powerful thrall! This is a dirty little secret the King and his knights keep from the townsfolk as they live in blissful ignorance. Morgan takes a young squire-type under his wing to teach him Aikido.

The King catches Carol trying to escape and calls her out on her act. He admits that he’s an actor too. Apparently he did his fair share of amateur theater back in the day. Ezekiel was a zookeeper who lost everything in the apocalypse except his loyal Shiva. Her presence helped him gain a following of people who needed help and leadership. But he only has the best of intentions and wants to give hope to the hopeless, and a sense of safety and happiness too. He and Morgan set Carol up in a little house on the outskirts where she can have solitude and contemplation without being a part of the commune. Also, methinks there is a romance brewing between Carol and the king. But are there also sparks between her and Morgan? This series needs a new love triangle already.

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Top 4 Moments of the Night:

1. Decapitating walkers whilst on horseback. Seriously awesome and effective! We should have been doing this the whole time, people!
2. The town choir sings Bob Dylan. Excuse me, where do I sign up??
3. Morgan. Morgan is my (very close) second favorite character after Daryl. I know, I’m a trashy Dixon fangirl, but at least I own it. Morgan’s arc in this series has been BEAUTIFUL. Please writers and producers, keep him around for a long time and continue to utilize this man!!
4. “Where there is life, there’s life” A quote from the good king to Carol. This is his motivation, and why he continues to help people and keep going despite the hellish world around them. Please don’t let this guy turn out to be a secret cannibal.

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Dead Digest: The Walking Dead (SSN 7, Ep 1)

Hi Bloodlust fam! Aunt Sandy will be here every week, recapping the most recent episode of AMC's The Walking Dead for you, and listing her top 4 moments of the night's episode. She hopes you also have an unhealthy codependent relationship with this show...

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Episode 1: "The Day Will Come When You Won't Be"

So, uh...yeah. Let’s just get right into this thing. SPOILERS AHEAD (obviously).

Season 7 picked up (more or less) right from that horrible stomach ache-inducing mess we were left with a few months ago, at the end of season 6. Negan is clearly a “put up or shut up” kinda guy; a lesson Abraham learned that the hard way when his head was turned into cherry jello before our very eyes. Poor devastated Rick swore he would kill Negan for this. Unsympathetic to Rick's devestation, Negan then set about systematically trying to break the spirit of our fearless leader - and, eventually, he did. Wow. So how'd Negan do it? First there was his weird RV fieldtrip in the mist to kill walkers, then the bashing in of Glenn’s head, followed by beating the already wounded Darryl, and lastly, threatening to shoot everyone in the group until Rick agreed to further disfigure his already one-eyed son. Thus, turning Carl into his one-eyed, one-handed son.

True to the source material, Glenn exited the show last night after a grueling bout with Lucille. Rick tried to resist, attempted to barter (as did Michonne), and cried big old tears but, in the end, Carl urged him to chop in order to save the fam. Negan stopped him at the last moment, finally believing he now owns the sheriff and all his people. Leaving them with a truck, instructions to collect all the treasure for him they can find, and the promise that he will return for a visit soon, Negan and his Saviors abducted Darryl as ransom and took off. Rick & friends are left to collect their soupy, fallen compadres and go home. This time, there will be no plan for vengeance. Our team now lives in a new kingdom ruled by a deranged, unremorseful, and brutal king. You live by his rules or you watch your loved ones be maimed and/or murdered in front of you.

We were told this episode would be a sort of "reset" to the series and that things would never be the same after Negan came to town. Tonight’s deaths were a HUGE loss for fans. Two favorites, including an OG character, were offed in the most heart breaking and devastating of ways. Someone has finally, actually, really broken Rick Grimes. Where do we go from here? Sounds like good horror TV to me.

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Top 4 moments of the night:

1. Glenn’s final words to his wife: “Maggie, I’ll find you.” I let out an audible gasp of sadness here. Totally beautiful despite the fact that one of his eyes was literally bulging out of his skull.
2. That weird yellow gunk that comes out of walkers now. Eeww. I wanna see more, though.
3. Carl giving his father permission to chop off his arm to save the others. Brave and heroic kiddo!
4. Negan’s psychotic, sadistic monologues. Bravo, sir!

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Dead of Summer

Hi campers! Welcome to camp Still Water! This show was brought to us from the fine people over at the FreeForm network, formerly known as the ABC Family channel. Viewers are transported to the Wisconsin woods in the year 1989. It's a few days before the kiddos arrive and we meet Camp Director Deb, still setting up with the help of some unlucky young adults counselors. We are treated to horror icon Tony Todd as the mysterious Spiritualist ghost, Holyoke. He is still haunting around the grounds after his murder at the turn of the last century. What else can you expect? How about a ritualistic cult drowning, scary, old tin type photos, a scarified deer, wonderfully queer youth, and more death? That’s all in the first episode!

You may want to file this ten-episode offering in either your “Guilty Pleasures” or “Family Friendly” horror folders. Personally, I’m a big fan of teen oriented horror and I probably always will be. So naturally I had to binge-watch this thing on Hulu. Now I understand this show isn’t for everyone, but if you’re still reading thus far, I think it could be for you. The series has a nice balance of spooky, PG-13 scares and gooey feels to warm your black little heart - if even just a little bit! There are definitely some eerie scenes and imagery. I don’t want to spoil things, but there will be demons...and Satanists...and more murder. Oh! There's even a little gore! Not to mention some really amazing love odes to the late, great, David Bowie.

Be kind when it comes to the visual effects, this is made for TV after all. That being said, there were actually a few which were surprisingly good. The premise is a simple one: sinister things are happening at the idyllic camp. Each episode reveals clues as an ancient evil unfolds its plan. The audience and the actors creep closer and closer to solving the mystery and discovering the truth, with lots of twists and shocks along the way. Okay, now that I have assured you there is some horror to satisfy your needs, we can move on.

The feels. As someone who does enjoy the “teen-scream” horror genre, I am pretty well versed in it. Nowadays, if you want to have your young characters show emotion, it sure as hell better not be too cheesy. All the camp counselors are fresh high school grads with real life problems. I can’t reveal too much, since their tough pasts play major roles in the show's overall plot. Meet Amy, a nice girl-next-door type who never went to the camp as a kid and is therefore an automatic outsider. Alex, the handsome chap who, we learn in episode two, is trying to shake his Russian immigrant past in a country that gets a little jumpy around eastern European accents. Other characters include Blair, openly gay and still dealing with it; Cricket, who wants people to see her as sexually desirable; Joel, a budding filmmaker with a painful family secret; “Blotter” is a former D&D geek who wants to seem badass; Drew is a Trans man, whose coworkers still don't know the truth; and lastly, there's Jessie. Jessie used to be friendly and kind but now just comes across kinda bitchy.

With the exception of some niche horror fans like myself, this show is really aimed at tweens and teens as something creepy (yet deep!) that they can watch with their parents. I like that people out there are making some cool content to get the youngsters introduced to our beloved genre. I can see these kids watching this with their parents or other awesome adult figures in their lives, and then craving more. Maybe they’ll like the super natural elements, or perhaps they’ll prefer the blood splatter and kills. Either way, I can see this as one of those fabulous gateway drugs youths can sink their little fangs into, thus starting a lifelong obsession.

~ Sandra (@LilMsMnstr)

A&E's Damien: A Eulogy

Well kids, sometimes life doesn’t go as we want it to. Here’s a good example for you: This spring, A&E’s Damien became a must-watch ritual for me. Like many horror fans out there, I adore the 1976 masterpiece The Omen and count it among my favorite films. I was naturally a little skeptical that this newfangled TV program would deliver on its promise of being a sequel to the original movie. They did mess with the timeline a little, but all in all, I think the showrunners nailed it on this one. Sadly, it was recently announced that Damien will not be returning for a second season. Brothers and sisters, please bow your heads in respect as I tell you about my dearly departed friend, Damien.

The premise of the show was simple enough to begin with. We met up with Damien Thorn, now thirty years old and working as a war photographer. We got references back to his mysterious adoption, the death of his parents, years spent toddling around The White House, and then off to fancy-pants boarding school. Damien only has one close friend now. The reason for his isolation? People tend to drop dead around the guy. Or if not dead, maimed or such. He’s like some kind of walking bad luck charm to anyone who he dares get close to. Damien himself manages to escape from any given situation unscathed and intact, yet increasingly lonely and melancholy. The armies of light and dark have known that Damien shall fully awaken to his role as the anti-Christ now that he’s 30 years old. His calling mirrors that of Jesus, who started his ministry at the same age. Poor Damien has folks on both sides of the good vs. evil battle after him, who all desperately want their team to win. One cool thing about grown-up Damien Thorn, is that he's not a bad guy. Sure, he’s the anti-Christ, but he’s also a caring dude who just wants to love and live his life. He’s actually pretty likable once you get to know him. That’s what made him interesting. He wasn’t all darkness. Would he ever truly be all evil? What would he do as the Destroyer? Could Damien possibly continue to use his power and influence for good? Alas, we shall never know!

I was delighted to see that each episode seemed to push the envelope more and more. They ramped up on the violence, gore, increased scares, creepy religious dialogue, and so on. So…what went wrong? Apparently, the viewership numbers were just not there. Clearly, this show failed to sink its teeth into the horror fans it needed to keep it alive. The show aired on A&E, and I’m guessing the powers that be over there assumed they would have a built in audience with the popularity of Bates Motel. Well, guess that didn’t go as planned. Should this have aired on an “edgier” network? An FX? Or an HBO type of place? Was this show not horror enough for the genre fans out there? I was delighted to see that each episode seemed to push the envelope more and more, with the increased gore and all that other good stuff. Yet, I’ll admit I was secretly hoping that season 2 would REALLY go for broke and ramp up on the spooky hell-related stuff. C’mon guys! We are already tuned into a show about the anti-Christ! Creep us out! We like it! It’s a tricky balance for a television show to deliver the scares while also continuing to develop characters and further the plot. Maybe poor Damien was never marketed correctly to his target audience? It always makes me sad when a horror TV show or movie really bombs. Regardless of whether the content is to my liking or not, I want our genre to do well. When horror does well it makes money! And when money is made, more horror gets made!

In closing, I hope you can appreciate my grief. No fan ever wants to hear their show has been cancelled after they’ve been roped in and spent time and energy getting invested into the thing. Farewell, Damien. I guess the apocalypse will just have to go on without you.

~ Sandra (@LilMsMnstr)