Best of 2016

Best Horror Movies of 2016: Amy's Picks

Are you sick of Best of the Year Lists yet? I hope not, because I've been putting mine off as long as possible. But for the best possible reason, I swear! There's no denying it has been a banner yeah for horror. In addition to being some of the highest-grossing films of the year, we saw a flood of critically acclaimed horror offerings stepping out of their midnight slots to become festival favorites. There have been so many flipping fantastic horror movies in 2016 that I've got a great list here for you even though I still haven't gotten to see Raw, Train to Busan or Demon. And I've probably missed a bunch of others. An embarrassment of riches, 2016. And since we know the greatest horror films are made during times of social upheaval, it looks like 2017 is going to produce even more riches. So, we've got that going for us. Anyway, here you go. And just to make it more difficult on myself, they're in order...


10. The Monster

This was a late addition to the list, knocking Green Room out of my top ten. Why? On the surface it's a creature feature in the most traditional & satisfying sense. I'm sure you'll be as psyched as I was to find that the monster is an actual person in a costume. That alone would almost be enough to earn the movie a spot on my list, but the heartbreakingly realistic mother-daughter relationship that is revealed through well placed flashbacks gives it an added layer of pathos that elevates it to something really special.


9. The Greasy Strangler

Bless this movie's weird little heart. I haven't seen anything this gleefully nutty in a long time. Never thought I would consider a movie filled with grease & penises to be refreshing, but here we are.


8. The ABCs of Death 2.5

Another unexpected surprise, this anthology featured more new talent than a year's worth of horror convention screenings, all trying their very hardest & all seeming to have a blast doing so. Almost every short is a winner, which is more than can be said for the previous offerings in the series. 

Listen to our episode on The ABCs of Death 2.5


7. The Invitation

The Invitation answers the age-old question "Could this party possibly get any worse?" Yes, my friends, it could. Great performances & expert direction put us on edge almost immediately, despite the deliberate pace & slow build. This is a great return to form for Karyn Kusama, whose last couple films were ruined by studio interference. I can't wait to see what she does next.

Listen to our episode on The Invitation


6. Under the Shadow

Last year we had A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night, which explored the role of women in the middle east. This year we have a more straightforward but no less fascinating depiction of the same topic. Some of the special effects missed the mark, but Under the Shadow ultimately succeeds in using the supernatural to make us feel the real horrors of war & oppression.

Listen to our episode on Under the Shadow


5. I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives In the House

This movie about a Shirley Jackson-esque author has the feel of one of her books. It's quiet, understated & eerie, & while not much happens, it casts a kind of spell on you. While admittedly not suited to everyone's taste, it worked for me like wow.

Listen to our episode on Pretty Thing


4. Baskin

Not since Hellraiser & Event Horizon have we gotten such a visceral & horrifying glimpse into hell. You wouldn't think the humor or the sing along scene would work with that, but it totally does. If you haven't seen it I'm sure that sounds ridiculous, but you're just gonna have to trust me.

Listen to our episode on Baskin


3. Darling 

If you're going to make an homage picture, you could certainly do worse than Repulsion. As uneven as Mickey Keating's other movies have been, this one feels like it popped out of his head fully-formed. Every sound, every flickering shot & every change in expression from the excellent Lauren Ashley Carter contributes to one unnerving little movie.

Listen to our episode on Darling

 


2. The Eyes of My Mother

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One of the coolest things about horror movies in 2016 is how many great first features we saw. Six out of the ten on this very list in fact, including the top two. Nicholas Pesce came seemingly out of nowhere & dropped this gorgeous movie on us, which gives us a look at the making of a psychopath from her own point of view. 

Listen to our episode on The Eyes of My Mother


1. The Witch

What's left to say about The Witch? Praise has been heaped all over this movie like so much chopped wood falling on your dad's head. So allow me to remind you about the scene pictured here. Remember this part? How chillingly ambiguous it is about whether the boy is actually being delivered from suffering by God or is only mocking his family's piety? That's powerful stuff. What makes The Witch an instant classic is that nearly every scene in the movie is just as powerful as this one. 

Listen to our episode on The Witch

Best Horror of 2016: Eddie's Picks

Our man Eddie is a man of few words. However, he did take the time to put together a "best of 2016" list so do yourselves a favor and read through his few, but poignant, words. Unless you're a total jabroni and don't like lists...


The Boy

Yep, the doll movie. SHUT UP! DON'T JUDGE ME, I LIKED IT! It is a silly movie with a loose plot and a strange twist, but it's all done in an amazing setting.

 

Don't Breathe

Oh shit! Super turbo blind guy smashes invading teens intent on robbing his home. Really fun watch with a twist that delighted and disgusted me.

 

Rats

Morgan Spurlock's "documentary" on the ever-growing rat population of our cities genuinely creeped me out. Mainly it was all the parasites shown that infest these little bastards. Bot flies...woof!

 

Late Night Cable

Friend of the show, Andrew Shearer, released an anthology film this year called "Late Night Cable" and it featured a short done by his pre pre-school daughter. It's just her running around filming things with some spooky music added to it. By far the most original thing I've seen this year and I'm totally a sucker for kiddos.

 

10 Cloverfield Lane

John fucking Goodman. That is all.

 
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The Autopsy of Jane Doe

This one hit my sweet spot by not being too smart or too dumb. It was a fun adventure that felt like a mash-up of CSI, Columbo, and The Goonies - all in a strange (but fun!) way.

 

ABC's of Death 2.5

What a treat this compilation film was. Incredibly fun shorts full of blood splatter, demons, heavy metal, hookers, big-wheel motorcycle gangs, and Elvis impersonators.

 

Baskin

Turkey's horror offering, Baskin, didn't disappoint at all. This freak show of a movie was so exciting and over-the-top, I have recommended it to all my strong-stomached horror friends.

 

The Invitation

The Invitation unnerved me more than any other movie I watched this year. This bottle horror suspense fest shattered my nerves by the end, but I enjoyed every minute of it.

 

The Witch

This masterpiece comes in at #1 for me. It had it all, from a devil-goat to a naked wild witch party in the woods. This film was crafted with love and it shows.


Best Horror of 2016: Jamie's Picks

I think most of us can agree that 2016 was a bit of a rough year -- it started out with the death of Alan Rickman & ended with Carrie Fisher's (so brutal)! But along with the generous portions of crap it threw at us, it did manage to give us a generous selection of quality horror. Do I expect you to agree that all of these were the best? No. Do I care if you think some of my choices are stupid and don't belong on any "best of" list? Also no. Without further ado (and in no particular order):

The Invitation

Director: Karyn Kusama | Release Date: April 2016

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Karyn Kusama's dark, cult-thriller was easily one of the best horror offerings of 2016. Her direction is wonderfully on point as she uses the interior of the L.A. house, the general stuffiness of a rich-person party, and the complexities of human grief to create an almost oppressively tense thriller. Seriously, this is one of those movies that made me feel almost sick with anxiety until its shocking ending.

10 Cloverfield Lane

Director: Dan Trachtenberg | Release Date: March 2016

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As a lifelong fan of Roseanne, I was beyond excited to see John Goodman kill it in his role as a lonely and seriously unstable doomsday-prepper. 10 Cloverfield Lane was everything (and more) that I wanted from Cloverfield - black comedy, aliens, bunkers, and John Goodman dancing to jukebox tunes. You don't need to have seen Cloverfield to understand/enjoy this movie so, if you haven't seen it, get on it.

Green Room

Director: Jeremy Saulnier | Release Date: May 2016

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So Green Room seems to be one of those movies that some folks like to claim is "not real horror." Personally, I think the shit that goes down in Green Room is most certainly horror. Patrick Stewart is the perfect badguy, playing the leader of a group of Nazi punk-rockers. I'd be remiss if I didn't mention the solid performance from the late Anton Yelchin. This movie was a fun ride right from the get-go and it did not hold back when it came to blood and gore - if nothing else, that's gotta make it "horror."

Stranger Things

Director: Matt Duffer, Ross Duffer, Shawn Levy | Release Date: July 2015

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Stranger Things was one of the two best shows to come out in 2016 (the second being Westworld - seriously...it was so gd good). I always get worried when there's a movie or show I'm really looking forward to. I hate being disappointed. That was 100% not the case with Stranger Things. Its nostalgic, Stand By Me feel and throwbacks to 80's horror (not to mention the Dungeons & Dragons references) were everything a girl could want in a Netflix show.

Don't Breathe

Director: Fede Alvarez | Release Date: August 2016

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This is the only one on my list that I even slightly considered leaving off. On the whole, I really liked Don't Breathe. This is the second year in a row we got a solid horror film set in Detroit, which is pretty great - even if directors are just taking advantage of the plethora of abandoned houses. The biggest success in Don't Breathe was the serious tension it created as the would-be-thieves snuck around the house, trying not to be detected by the blind homeowner. My biggest issue with the movie was the total story curveball it threw in its third act (particularly the bit involving a turkey baster). That issue aside, Don't Breathe was a tension-filled home invasion success.

Black Mirror - Season 3 (episodes 2 & 3) 

Director: Dan Trachtenberg (ep 2), James Watkins (ep 3) | Release Date: October 2016

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Black Mirror was another Netflix show whose release I was anxiously waiting for. I am a HUGE fan of the first two seasons so naturally I had really high hopes, and while I wasn't wild about every episode, numbers two & three had everything I expect from Black Mirror. Episode 2, "Playtest," is about a young guy, who tests out a new virtual reality horror game that involves exploring a haunted house, so of course horror fans should like it. Episode 3, "Shut Up and Dance," was by far my favorite episode of the season. To me, it was up there with my all-time favorites - definitely one of those episodes that sticks with you for a couple of days. Black Mirror has always been great at using relatable, real-life scenarios (typically with a futuristic feel & cool technological twist) to tell a story that sits with you for days.

Southbound

Director: Radio silence, Roxanne Benjamin, David Bruckner, Patrick Horvath | Release Date: February 2016

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Southbound already had a leg-up on the competition for me since it's an anthology - I'm just a sucker for them. But this movie had more than just that going for it. It had some seriously great segments that I thought were better than some of the full-length movies this year. There were awesome, floating death-monsters, weird time-slips, and a pretty brutal leg break. I hope 2017 has fewer V/H/S or ABC's of Death sequels and more anthologies like Southbound.

The Eyes of My Mother

Director: Nicolas Pesce | Release Date: December 2016

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I didn't know anything about this movie before I watched it, which was probably for the best. I think if I had looked into it at all, I would've assumed I wasn't going to like it - it's not really the type of movie I'm drawn to. All of that being said, I absolutely loved this movie. It was beautifully shot, had solid performances, and managed to make a murderer's story a somewhat sympathetic one. Honestly, even if you don't enjoy black & white movies, I highly recommend giving this a watch.

Demon

Director: Marcin Wrona | Release Date: September 2016

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This Polish film is a retelling of the Yiddish tale of the dybbuk, which is a malicious possessing spirit. I had no idea Yiddish lore could be so creepy. The story centers around a man, Peter, who travels to Poland to get married and settle down in his new wife's parents' house. Strange things start happening right away and during his wedding, he starts to feel and act, well...strange. That's all I'll say. I was pretty transfixed throughout the whole movie, to be honest. It's definitely one I'll watch again.

I Am Not A Serial Killer

Director: Billy O'Brien | Release Date: August 2016

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I was definitely excited to check this one out - if not only to see Mr. Christopher Lloyd be amazing once again. Based on a popular Young Adult novel, I Am Not a Serial Killer tells the story of a young teen's unhealthy obsession with serial killers (and fear that he may even be becoming one). Maybe it's the fact that his mother is the town mortician and has him assist with embalming. Maybe it's the multiple allusions to his not-so-healthy mental health. Whatever it is, the teen soon finds himself in the midst of a murder mystery when people in his town keep winding up as victims of brutal murders. I feel like folks will either love or hate the ending, which is understandable - it's a bit on the supernatural side. I liked it so I think it's definitely worth a watch!

The Autopsy of Jane Doe

Director: André  Øvredal | Release Date: December 2016

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André Øvredal (Trollhunter) finishes the year with this seriously fantastic thriller about a father/son team of coroners, conducting an autopsy on the recently discovered corpse of a girl. I don't want to give too much info away about this one (our next podcast episode will be on it) - I'd rather just tell you to check it out. I loved it. I'm also happy that this was the last horror movie I saw in 2016 - made it end on a pretty high note.

The Shallows

Director: Jaume Collet-Serra | Release Date: June 2016

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It's been far too long since a decent shark-related thriller has been released in theaters. So when The Shallows was announced, I was pretty much already a fan. I'm a long-time sucker for shark movies and when they're actually good, that's even better. The Shallows could easily have been a cheesy, one-note crapfest. Instead, it was a solid thriller that was beautifully shot and well acted (Blake Lively carried it entirely on her own). If you're at all a fan of shark flicks, you would be doing yourself a disservice if you didn't check this one out.

The VVitch

Director: Robert Eggers | Release Date: February 2016

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One name: Black Phillip. The true star of 2016. In all seriousness, though, I. Love. This. Movie. My theatrical viewing of it was slightly marred when Peter Cetera's voice drifted in from the next theater (showing Deadpool - also great). However, after a second viewing at home, I was onboard with everything Robert Eggers was doing. The family's isolation, along with their religious paranoia, work to create a seriously unnerving movie. The Witch is the only movie I can confidently assign a rating to - #1 obvs.

There they are. My favorites. If you have some faves that didn't make my list, leave them in the comments.

I will give honorable mention to: ABC's of Death 2.5, Under the Shadow, and Blair Witch.