Horror movie reviews artfully conducted by two classy queers

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63 | The Autopsy of Jane Doe

Tommy & Austin Tilden are father & son coroners who have the body of a Jane Doe delivered to their home-morgue after the police discover it half-buried in the cellar at the scene of an already gruesome & very confusing crime scene. The pair realize there are some serious abnormalities with their corpse before they even cut her open. Her wrists & ankles appear to be broken, but there are no marks on her body. And it just gets weirder from there.

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63 | The Autopsy of Jane Doe
The Bloodlust

Director/Writer: André Øvredal

Stars: Brian Cox, Emile Hirsch, Ophelia Lovibond

Synopsis: Tommy & Austin Tilden are father & son coroners who have the body of a Jane Doe delivered to their home-morgue after the police discover it half-buried in the cellar at the scene of an already gruesome & very confusing crime scene. The pair realize there are some serious abnormalities with their corpse before they even cut her open. Her wrists & ankles appear to be broken, but there are no marks on her body. And it just gets weirder from there.


We've been looking forward to this one for a while. Join us for our next episode, when we'll discuss M. Night's new one, Split.

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Episode 62: The Eyes of My Mother

62 | The Eyes of My Mother
The Bloodlust

Director/Writer: Nicolas Pesce

Stars: Kika Magalhaes, Will Brill, Olivia Bond

Synopsis: Little Francisca lives on a remote farm with her Portuguese-transplant mother & taciturn father. She idolizes her mother, a former surgeon who is seen teaching her about her namesake, St. Francis of Assisi, & giving her anatomy lessons using the local cows. An act of violence is the catalyst which influences Francisca’s psychologically damaged development into very lonely adulthood. The movie progresses towards an inevitable conclusion as Francisca becomes increasingly desperate for companionship in addition to becoming more & more unhinged.

Our dear pal Becky (@bexbz) joins us for this review.


Join us next time as we review The Autopsy of Jane Doe. This was a late additon to the 2016 horror club but was totally worth the wait. It's available for rent so check it out and listen in for our review.

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61 | I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House

61 | I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House
The Bloodlust

Director/Writer: Oz Perkins

Stars: Ruth Wilson, Paula Prentiss, Lucy Boynton, Bob Balaban

Synopsis: A young woman takes a job as a live-in hospice nurse for an elderly novelist. The longer she stays in the dying woman's home, the closer she comes to learning the identity of the author's muse. It's a truth far scarier than fiction.


Join us next time when we discuss and review the recent, indie thriller, The Eyes of my Mother. The directorial debut from total newbie, Nicolas Pesce, this movie is sure to make more than a few "Top 10 of 2016" lists. The Eyes of My Mother is current available on VOD, or for rent on Amazon, iTunes, and Google Play.

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60 | Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

Director: David Yates

Writer: J.K. Rowling

Stars:  Eddie Redmayne (Newt), Katherine Waterson (Tina), Alison Sudol (Queenie), Dan Folger (Kowalski), Colin Farrell (Graves), Ezra Miller (Credence), Ron Perlman, Johnny Depp 

Synopsis:  Shy and awkward wizard, Newt Scamander, travels from the UK to New York, with plans to make it to the exotic land of Arizona so he can release his precious Thunderbird, Frank, back to the wild. He is shocked to learn that American wizards have very different - and much more strict - rules regarding magical beasts and interactions with no-majs (the American version of muggle). When a few magical beasts escape from his suitcase, Newt and his new friends Tina, Jacob, and Queenie work together to track them all down. But there’s something much more dangerous threatening not only the lives of no-majs, but the exposure of the wizarding world in America.

60 | Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
The Bloodlust

Director: David Yates

Writer: J.K. Rowling

Stars: Eddie Redmayne (Newt), Katherine Waterson (Tina), Alison Sudol (Queenie), Dan Folger (Kowalski), Colin Farrell (Graves), Ezra Miller (Credence), Ron Perlman, Johnny Depp

Synopsis: Shy and awkward wizard, Newt Scamander, travels from the UK to New York, with plans to make it to the exotic land of Arizona so he can release his precious Thunderbird, Frank, back to the wild. He is shocked to learn that American wizards have very different - and much more strict - rules regarding magical beasts and interactions with no-majs (the American version of muggle). When a few magical beasts escape from his suitcase, Newt and his new friends Tina, Jacob, and Queenie work together to track them all down. But there’s something much more dangerous threatening not only the lives of no-majs, but the exposure of the wizarding world in America.


Next up, we'll be watching one of the longest-titled movies ever, Oz Perkins' I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House. This 2016 thriller about a nurse who is caring for an elderly woman in her creepy house, stars Ruth Wilson and is the second horror film directed by Oz Perkins, son of Anthony Perkins (his directorial debut was 2015's The Blackcoat's Daughter). I Am the Pretty Thing is currently streaming on Netflix so go check it out and join us next time for our review!

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Recap - AHS: Roanoke (SSN 6, Ep 10)

This is it, folks. This is the final episode of *AHS: Roanoke*. This is the episode that will tie together all those loose ends from the previous nine episodes and leave us with a feeling of completion. Or at least, that's what we hope to get from a final episode. I guess you'll just have to watch, listen, & find out!

Recap - AHS: Roanoke (SSN 6, Ep 10)
Amy, Jamie, & Jonah

Title: "Chapter 10"

Aired: 11/16/2016

Synopsis: This is it, folks. This is the final episode of AHS: Roanoke. This is the episode that will tie together all those loose ends from the previous nine episodes and leave us with a feeling of completion. Or at least, that's what we hope to get from a final episode. I guess you'll just have to watch, listen, & find out!

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Recap - AHS: Roanoke (SSN 6, Ep 9)

Even more characters bite the dust in this penultimate episode of American Horror Story: Roanoke. We begin the episode with Audrey, Monet, Lee, and newcomer, Dylan, and, as promised, we end the episode with one survivor. Who will be the survivor? Will Lee succeed in finding the incriminating video of her confession? Will we find out why there's been so much pig action? Tune in an find out!

Recap - AHS: Roanoke (SSN 6, Ep9)
Amy & Jamie

Title: "Chapter 9"

Aired: 11/9/2016

Synopsis: Even more characters bite the dust in this penultimate episode of American Horror Story: Roanoke. We begin the episode with Audrey, Monet, Lee, and newcomer, Dylan, and, as promised, we end the episode with one survivor. Who will be the survivor? Will Lee succeed in finding the incriminating video of her confession? Will we find out why there's been so much pig action? Tune in and find out!

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59 | Under the Shadow

During the Iran-Iraq War in 1988, a woman and her daughter are left alone in their Tehran apartment, while her husband serves in the military. After other tenants in the apartment building decide to move north in an attempt to escape the likely destruction of Tehran, Shideh goes against the wishes of her husband and remains in the apartment, despite the danger. But it isn't just bombs that Shideh and her daughter have to be afraid of. There seems to be a malevolent force in the apartment, intent on taking everything from them.

Want to skip the small talk? We start the review at 00:12:15

59 | Under the Shadow
The Bloodlust

Director/Writer: Babak Anvari

Stars: Narges Rashidi, Avin Manshadi, Bobby Naderi

Synopsis: During the Iran-Iraq War in 1988, a woman and her daughter are left alone in their Tehran apartment, while her husband serves in the military. After other tenants in the apartment building decide to move north in an attempt to escape the likely destruction of Tehran, Shideh goes against the wishes of her husband and remains in the apartment, despite the danger. But it isn't just bombs that Shideh and her daughter have to be afraid of. There seems to be a malevolent force in the apartment, intent on taking everything from them.

Want to skip the small talk? We start the review at 00:12:15


The real world can be scary enough so we're gonna switch it up next time and review the non-horror movie, Fantastic Beasts & Where to Find Them. That's right, folks. All that Harry Potter chat peppered-in throughout our episodes has been for no reason other than we love Harry Potter. So with this next episode being our 60th, we gettin crazy and reviewing HP. If that ain't your thing, you can listen to some past episodes instead. We'll be back in the horror game next time.

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Recap - AHS: Roanoke (SSN 6, Ep 8)

Lee, Audrey, and Monet, still captives of the deranged and quite obviously inbred Polks, try to find a way to escape their captors and get the hell outta dodge. Dominic and Shelby face a familiar horror as they try to make it through the first night in the Roanoke house. We're getting close to the end of the season here and it's getting harder to speculate what Mr. Murphy is going to throw at us in the final two episodes.

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Recap - AHS: Roanoke (SSN 6, Ep 8)
Jamie & Amy

Title: "Chapter 8"

Aired: 11/2/2016

Synopsis: Lee, Audrey, and Monet, still captives of the deranged and quite obviously inbred Polks, try to find a way to escape their captors and get the hell outta dodge. Dominic and Shelby face a familiar horror as they try to make it through the first night in the Roanoke house. We're getting close to the end of the season here and it's getting harder to speculate what Mr. Murphy is going to throw at us in the final two episodes.

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Recap - AHS: Roanoke (SSN 6, Ep 7)

The whole gang (ok, almost the whole gang) is still at the Roanoke house for the filming of Sidney's "sure to be a hit" show, *Return to Roanoke: 3 Days in Hell*. But since we all know what goes down in Roanoke during the Blood Moon, it comes as no surprise when character start dropping like little piggies.

Recap - AHS: Roanoke (SSN 6, Ep 7)
Jamie & Amy

Title: "Chapter 7"

Aired: 10/26/2016

Synopsis: The whole gang (ok, almost the whole gang) is still at the Roanoke house for the filming of Sidney's "sure to be a hit" show, Return to Roanoke: 3 Days in Hell. But since we all know what goes down in Roanoke during the Blood Moon, it comes as no surprise when character start dropping like flies little piggies.


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